Life Lesson From The Cafeteria Lady
By Debra Thomas at Livelifered.com
Have you ever had one of those days when you “get in your head”? One of those days, you are oblivious to what’s happening in the world around you because all you can think about is your problems.
I had one of those days when I was teaching elementary music in Taylor, Arizona, many years ago.
I was pregnant with my fourth daughter, tired, and focused on caring for myself to make it through the day.
I was wearing an olive green maternity jumper with a white puffy-sleeved blouse. I remember having sandals on that day, and my feet and hands were swelling. It was nearing the time I would give birth to my fourth daughter, Chelsea.
I had just finished my duty in the cafeteria and had entered the lunch line as the final person the cafeteria ladies would be serving that day.
The first cafeteria lady dished up an extra-large portion of lasagna onto my tray. She passed my tray on to the next lady, who dished up a more than healthy amount of green beans. My tray was then passed to the third lady, from whom I dished up a large spoon full of canned pears.
Lastly, the final lady, the cafeteria manager, placed two pieces of cornbread on my tray. She then pulled two chocolate milk cartons out of the refrigerator, handed me my tray along with a napkin and straw, gave me a big smile, and said, “ there you go, Mrs. Thomas; I hope you enjoy your lunch.”
I took the tray in both hands, so I wouldn’t spill as I was starving and walked off.
Eating was the only thing keeping me from throwing up when I was pregnant and tired. Although eating didn’t always help, it was a temporary fix, and I lived for those moments when I was eating and felt better.
I began to ravenously eye the food on my plate as I walked out of the cafeteria line and shuffled towards the nearest and cleanest table. As soon as I arrived, I sat down and began to eat and semi-enjoy my food as I watched the cafeteria ladies clean.
One swept the floors with a wide broom, and the next followed behind her with a mop: the cafeteria manager, the. One with a big smile and the other lunch lady began to wash off tables and fold up benches.
The cafeteria manager approached me as I was finishing my last bite of lasagna and feeling somewhat relieved of my daily pregnancy nauseousness. “Mrs. Thomas, I hate to bother you, but did you know that you were the only person who came through our lunch line today who did not say thank you?”
The feeling of relief from my nauseousness suddenly returned. My sense of physical relaxation and comfort from the satisfying cafeteria lunch I had just eaten was immediately replaced by stress and disappointment in myself. Tears began to flow from my eyes and trickle down my cheeks; soon, they dripped down into my leftover pears.
I felt genuinely saddened that I had gotten so lost in my world of misery that I had failed to recognize the service provided to me by others. On that memorable day, the Taylor Elementary cafeteria lady taught one of my greatest life lessons.
My Lesson Learned
Even in our suffering, we can take a brief moment to honor others by recognizing the service they render us. -Debra-
My Problem
My problem was that I was only worried about myself. This cafeteria manager had taught every child in Taylor Elementary the value of learning to say “thank you,” and now she had taught me — a grown adult, a teacher, and a supposed leader.
My Wake-Up Call
Being called on the carpet by the cafeteria lady was an important event in my life because it awoke me to the reality that there is a whole world of people out there who also have needs:
- They, too, deserve respect.
- They, too, deserve honor for their service.
- They, too, have needs.
- Deeper Learning
My new learning at that moment was that there could be a disconnect within our minds. How we think we are is not aligning with our observable actions. At that moment, I felt I was a self-sacrificing person giving up my health and well-being to be the mother of Chelsea.
My belief was not the whole reality of that experience. My deeper learning was that I needed to get out of my head, step back, and take time to see the entire picture and focus on the other people in the day-to-day scenes of my life.
What Next?
What can we do when we. Find ourselves in this type of situation — when we are experiencing the results of what has happened when you “get in our heads”?
Here’s a list of things to try:
- Openly confess to the error of our ways.
- Make a determined effort to change.
- Aim to make our “weakness” our “strength” in the future
- Overall, recognize that we are all God’s children with problems and worries.
- It is essential to step outside ourselves and connect
Key Opportunity for Growth
Anytime we experience a moment in our lives where we are called on the carpet, we are presented with a brief moment to decide what direction we will choose. Will we ignore the wake-up call and remain the same? Or will we accept the error of our ways, acknowledge our mistakes, and use the learning experience to inspire further growth in our lives? -Debra-
Since that event in my life, I have deliberately focused on saying thank you to everyone that serves me or helps me in any way.
There have been many times since then when I have stopped in my path, turned around, and returned to someone to ensure that I have said: “thank you.”
Remembering to say thank you might even include turning my car around after having driven several miles or calling someone later in the day to make sure that I have said thank you for the services they have rendered me.